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My new love affair with the presence

“I’ll just keep saying yes and see where it takes me.”—John Roedel

Okay, okay. I admit it. I’m sometime prone to hyperbole. I end sentences (especially when responding to comments) with three, sometimes four exclamation points. I occasionally get unreasonably excited about the simplest things. And I’ve been known to dance in places where others are grocery shopping or eating sushi.

But this new exhilaration (about the connection I’ve been mentioning) feels anything but overstated. Or exaggerated. To the contrary, it feels like the most true and authentic adventure I’ve ever undertaken. I’m actually starting to trust that I’m tapping into “the something bigger” I’ve been writing about my whole life.

I still get scared and feel like a phony at times, but it always comes back to this sense that real answers are being delivered, answers I would have no other way of accessing.

And the best part is this presence is spilling over into my non-writing life.  Like things I need are mysteriously showing up. People I’m meant to meet are dropping into my inbox.

And this weekend, I heard clear instructions for dealing with an extremely puzzling life dilemma from one of my favorite mentors.

I’ve wrestled with this particular issue for well…ever! It comes up in comments on my FB page and here on the blog. I’ve never had a good answer.

How does someone with so many blessings respond to thorny issues like poverty, war, famine? How is it fair that I have such an easy life?  And how does “believing in life’s beneficence” contribute to those in other parts of the world who, according to news reports, seem to be suffering?

Having traveled extensively, I’m fully aware that most stereotypes we attribute to those without, say running water or a pair of shoes are usually way off.  Those we call “less fortunate” are often a gazillion times happier than folks I know with a closet full of Birkin bags. Birkin bags, for the uninformed, start at around $8 grand and well, some ring in at $350,000.

Being completely uninterested in material things (true riches in my universe are relationships, art, nature, creativity), I wouldn’t even recognize (let alone be impressed) by the Hermes bags that allegedly provide a better investment than the stock market.  

But back to the question for which I’ve long wondered. What can an uber-blessed person like myself do for people who weren’t born with endless opportunities? Michael Beckwith, my long-time mentor (I go to his church every time I’m in L.A. and I was thrilled to be interviewed by him when E-Squared first came out), said those of us who “know” have a responsibility to serve as vibrational proxy for those who don’t.

Those of us with the luxury of waking up each morning without worries about our next meal owe it to our brother and sisters to reflect infinite truth. To follow the path that was given to us and to hold a vision that everyone deserves happiness and peace. 

In the worldview that’s prevalent now, people believe they must be physically present to assist others.

This is the worldview we’re leaving behind.

And why it’s so important to stand in vibrational proxy for every sentient being—demonstrating that all of us are one. Demonstrating that death doesn’t exist. Demonstrating that, despite, how it looks to the naked eye, everything is going to be okay. My joy doesn’t interfere with other’s right to have it. There’s plenty for everyone.

AND….when you’re hooked in and communing daily with Infinite Intelligence, any instructions that require your physical or financial presence will be crystal clear. You will be told exactly what to do. There will be no question.

Thank you, Michael Beckwith, for clearing this up for me. And thank you Divine Intelligence for hiring me to spread joy.

#222 Forever!

Pam Grout is the author of 20 books including E-Squared, E-Cubed, Thank & Grow Rich and her latest book, The Course in Miracles Experiment: A Starter Kit for Rewiring Your Mind (And Therefore Your World)

66 Responses

  2. Yes!!! Ty for the uplifting blogs!! Holding the highest frequency of joy and gratitude so that more can know it’s there. We can feel, attune, embody, & entrain our magnetic vibrations. Imagine what the world looks like when more and more folks live in this light! ✨💜✨💜✨

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  3. Thank you, Pam, so perfect. Being ONE with the ONE is the ultimate place to be, a fulfillment of JOY overflowing which blesses everyone. I love your posts!!

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  4. Thank you Pam for sharing this. I’ve held the same conundrum about my own journey. It’s a reminder that we’re given many paths & opportunities to trust in, and follow, our inner guidance and the greater Presence.
    Coleen

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  6. And, THANK YOU Pam! I’m so happy to be seeing you (in email land) more frequently! You always add more brightness to my day! Keep em coming!

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  8. Thank you for this extraordinarily epic post!
    I, too, get “unreasonably excited” about the simplest things, and tend to break out in song and/or dance whenever, wherever. Can’t not!
    And I have been aware of Michael Beckwith for years, and have listened to him a time or two. But – just this past week – I have been totally binging on podcasts with him. Both his podcast and other’s that are interviewing him.
    His messages, like yours, are very comforting and reassuring to me.
    We do what we can, when we can, in the physical and financial realms. And at all times, we put all the love, peace, joy, and goodness out into the Universe, knowing that it is beneficial for all beings.
    I wish everyone an Amazingly Awesome day!
    xox

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  13. Beautifully expressed! Thank you, thank you. I felt a welling up as truth resonates deeply. ❤️🙏

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  14. Dear Pam, thank You so so so much 😍💖🩷💜
    Let us spread all the Joy ’cause it’s truly abundant! 😍😍😍🥰🥳🥳🥳🥳🦋🦋💟🩷💖💜🥰😍❣️❤️🐥🐥🐥🐥🦋💝💟🦋🩷💖
    With Pure Love, Teija 🦋💟

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  15. Pam, your messages are a huge drop of JOY in my in-box!!! Rather like a magical butterfly swooping around, or a rainbow after a burst of rain… or the sweet song of the Pacific Wren!!!!!! Thank you so much for your reminders that we are all interconnected sparkling drops of the infinite ocean of bliss! Happy lunar eclipse everyone, and happy day too. Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  16. Thank you for the reminder. I love experiences over things! I do not watch the news but when I see a fear mongering story cross my path, I look at it as a movie. I prefer to focus on what I can see and how I can help, and always prefer to give items over money (unless I research the foundation and I know I am not donating to someone’s over inflated salary). It is easy if you look, like when I go shopping I buy extra food to put in the food donation bin. And sometimes it is just a smile or holding the door open for the next person. And every night when I pray I send love to everyone. Have an awesome, amazing day!!!

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  17. I love absolutely everything you post.. but this one in particular struck a deep chord that prompts me to share. I learned of the ‘Loving All Method of Awakening’ about 5 years ago. It’s been called by some the fasted route to awakening.. and it’s been life changing for me. I realized recently that it’s apparently settled into my heart permanently now, where I can feel it, and I don’t have to consciously think about loving some person/some thing/some event anymore in order to change my fear for it into love. I love it all, just as it is. And so I feel peace about ‘it all,’ trusting absolutely everything has loving purpose in the Big Guy’s plan, so there’s nothing TO fear. What I used to call synchronicities, I now realize are examples of ‘purpose revealed’.. and so I watch and wait expectantly for them! I don’t always dance when that happens.. but I do always say,’Thank you’!! (You can Google ‘loving all method’ to learn more.)

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  18. Love this post Pam!

    Yesterday, while visiting Seattle, as I was headed into a cute little shop to sit in front of a fire and enjoy a delicious hot mocha, I saw a homeless woman gathering her things, after having slept outside all night. And she would spend her day how – probably walking and being forced to move from place to place with no access to shelter, food or even a restroom. I felt a twinge of guilt and confusion about the unfairness of it all. I let my mind go through quotes and teaching that help me like – Abraham Hicks thoughts about how you can’t get unhappy enough to make someone else happy, and the quote about needing a higher level of consciousness to find the solutions, and lastly Hawkins energy chart. You managed to weave all of these together in your brief message!

    While these teachings helped, I still found moments of deep sadness wash over me. What finally pulled me out of it was when I accepted my good fortune, fell into gratitude and prayed that I would be worthy of all the blessings in my life.

    Thank you for this post and for your books! I read E-Squared in 2013 and it changed my life and this year I bought 2 dozen anniversary editions to share with members of my fitness classes.
    You rock! (and so does Michael Beckwith) 😊

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  19. When I am sending love to family and friends, I include people, plants, animals and Mother Nature around the planet. After all, we are all a hologram. The more we do this, the sooner it dissipates the hate and anger so prevalent today.

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  20. Wow that was impressive and so clear to understand. Thank you for your writing and giving such an inspiration to those who don’t have access to mentors like Michael Beckworth. Pass it on it’s such a great way to go when in your heart you know. Your information is to be spread not kept as if only you could have that knowledge. Your sharing is a wonderful example for all of us thank you. Pamela

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  21. ¡Que guay! I see your vibe, and I raise mine. You’re an expression of Divine Intelligence, Pam, and I appreciate the reminder that I AM, too. 💗

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  24. You made me cry today. I was seeing “me” in you and your words. I don’t use exclamation marks, I use…. the triple dot. … I played Marco Polo in a Michaels craft store with a dear friend of mine, (my version of you dancing). Since I was a little girl, I always KNEW that I was “meant for something bigger”. THE EXACT SAME WORDS. That was when I could feel the ugly cry coming on. My life has truly been Blessed in Soooo many ways. Then there’s the “connecting” of the dots and in doing that I can’t help but come into an AWARENESS of what is “really” happening,,,that I’m a “messenger” or “Conduit” of sorts that has perspectives that others seek out. As I’m type this, I’m in the “hearing the message loud and clear” place. Again with the GOOD, Ugly cry. I don’t know if the tears are from seeing the path now, or in the KNOWING Of the Blessing that is there without visually “seeing” it? The ONE thing I do know, is that I NO LONGER try to hide the DOT CONNECTING when I relay my experiences in the physical loss of JOY, Loss of material objects, and how my KNOWING still allowed me to “shine” in my recovery of those experiences. Finding the Purpose EVERY morning when my feet hit the floor, that “Today, I’m doing something that I LOVE to do”. Rebirthing myself in a way, because now I understand that I CAN, I’m ALLOWED, I’m even ENCOURAGED to do that. I began living my life with Intention. I was introduced to the teachings of Dr. Wayne Dyer, Esther and Jerry Hicks, and Louise Hay so I was already “in the lane,,,,,but,,, I have to tell you, I started reading E-Squared at the end of August of 2013. I thought, well, I’ll read thru the book, and see which experiment resonates with me and do that. Yeahhhhh, THAT didnt work,,,because in Experiment #2, The Volkswagen Jetta Principle, it hit me that, “I can do this one for tomorrow!” The first one was a black cat. I hadnt seen one in FOREVER in our neighborhood. This was 12 hrs after I opened the Field of Infinite Possiblities 😀 The second one was a little more profound. My Mom had passed 2 years prior, and I was missing her one night. I asked for a “sign” of sorts from her, so I would KNOW she was still there with me. That next day my son and I went to order a pizza from Pizza Hut. When we got there, and paid for the pizza, I didnt really look at the receipt until we got into the car. The receipt had her name, Molly, on it,,,that was the name of the young woman that rang me up. The street number of my last address was the total, and my entire name was on the bottom of the receipt. So in my head, our names were together and she was letting me know she still has eyes on me!
    I wish I could say that I finished E-Squared, but alas, (I’ve ALWAYS wanted to say that in a conversation! LOL) I cannot because I am STILL Living in Experiment #2!!!!! Thank you for the coming into my path today,,YOU were part of my DOT Connecting!!!!

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  27. This is so helpful. Thank you Pam. This is the message I keep getting….and answers do seem to be coming….We are here on this earth at an amazing time …..thank you for being there as we do this journey

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  29. I as usual LOVE reading your blogs… I use the triple dots and exclamation points and lots and lots of happy emojis 😊😆😊!!! It is my way to let people know that, no matter what, things are still working out for our greatest good!!! I even love when people call me crazy haha, I know I am and I am loving it!!! I love it because it is my way to help everyone around me, including the world 🤩 Love you Pam Grout!!! You are ALWAYS in my heart and in my mind 🥰

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  31. Thank you Pam for sharing Michael Beckwith’s answer to your puzzling question. I’ve struggled with that one too, and wondered about the apparent ‘unfairness’ of life that seems to richly bless some of us and regularly devastate others. I don’t know if there will ever be an answer that completely eases my mind about this dilemma, but Michael’s answer is one that has got me thinking and feeling a little better about it. 🙏
    It’s very exciting that you feel you are really ‘tapping into “the something bigger”’ and that this connection is “spilling over” into your non-writing life. Woohoo!! It’s exciting for us here in your “blog world” too because we’re getting the benefit of your connection with Presence. Yeah!! (And by the way, I don’t think you suffer from “exclamation-itis” – an ‘illness’ a writing teacher told me she suspected I had! 😁 Exclamation points are extremely useful when we are particularly excited, so use them as much as you want Pam, and I will too – even if it means I do have exclamation-itis!! 😄)
    So, please keep sharing what you learn because your words are a gift and we are blessed by them. And I am also very glad that “Divine Intelligence hired you to spread joy” because you do! Thank you DI and Pam! 😁🙏💃🌏🌹🦋😘

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  32. I am working on the courage I see in you, stepping out & in, to my true self…thank you for being the beaming example 😉 I still need a stick of dynamite under my a!! though.

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  33. wonderful uplifting perfect timing message Pam! Thank you for sharing your wisdom with humor and love! Joyfully, Pegatha*

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  34. I LOVE the idea of the Divine HIRING us to do the work.. It IS a job – one that we are all equip to do and moving into that role does bring joy… thank you Pam for your sharing your inspirational words and actions.

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  35. Pam, I am so grateful for you and when I need understanding, there you are writing or speaking about what I’m experiencing. That’s not by accident. I call it divine coincidence.
    Thank you for not just writing about living in joy, but showing up even when you don’t know your words are needed.
    You’re not just writing about it, you’re living it! Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!

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  37. This is an amazing message to all! I too felt guilty about my fortunate life and then I got a slap with Cauda Equina and their pain (Palestine) became my pain. OMG I wouldn’t even wish this pain on the devil! The suffering of others can’t really be felt or understood unless you experience suffering.

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  38. This Just In… Jesus Ate Lunch At Popeye’s Today
    Posted onApril 7, 2016 by Agent X

    Some stories I just don’t tell, and I really struggle with telling this one.

    The whole secret-agent-for-Jesus-network, started with a blog called The Agent B Files, and always was intended to honor Jesus’ directive in Matthew 6:3-4. It is intended to be a way of sharing God’s work without taking personal credit for it. However, there is no doubt plenty of people know my identity on the one hand, and telling the story is not keeping it secret on the other. Despite measures taken to mute my identity, this ministry is designed to aid God’s people to imagine the world differently and to bear God’s image in it largely through portrayal of caring for the poor.

    Without exhausting all of the caveats and concerns, I was soooooooo deeply blessed to eat lunch with Jesus today in the Popeye’s fast-food joint down on 82nd and University, that I feel compelled to tell you about it. I should say that earlier this morning, my wife (Mrs. Agent X) and I made a trip to Walmart up on 82nd and Milwaukee. As we pulled onto the lot, we saw a man holding a “hungry…homeless” sign as we drove by. By the time we parked, I could see a Walmart employee walking out to the far part of the lot toward the beggar. I followed after him to see how this would go.

    I will not reveal my part in that exchange at this time, but I will say that it was obvious Walmart did not want that man there, and by the time I returned to Mrs. Agent X, we were both considering the option of taking this man home with us. However, he got away and that did not happen. But a half hour later, I was running a final errand for Mrs. Agent X when I bumped into a second homeless guy – on 82nd Street no less!

    His name was *Agent H* and he looked like a cross between Rambo and Charlie Manson – (more Charlie than Rambo). He hobbled, more than walked, and used a walking stick. I saw him as I waited my turn to get an oil change in my wife’s vehicle, and then found him at the 7/11 across the street shortly afterward, just as he was about to dive a dumpster.

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    I don’t know his age, but based on things he told me during lunch, I would guess him between 55 and 65, but looking like 75. He was a bent figure, looked very fragile and unsteady. I pulled up by the dumpster and invited him to join me for lunch.

    He got in the front seat with great difficulty and mumbled his words so that I could hardly make out a sentence he said. I had a rough one on the line. Very rough. As soon as he got in, I went to plan B – “Would you like me to take you to a doctor?” I asked. He shook off the suggestion. I decided not to force it.

    In my experience on the streets, I find that some people cannot eat the same food(s) I would. Bad teeth, you see (not to mention every now and then someone is diabetic or so on) AND sometimes I try to take care not to upset their diet. So I asked where he would like to go. He didn’t care. So we went back across the street to Popeye’s which was very handy.

    I should say that I happened to be wearing my neon Fat Beggars shirt with the message “JESUS WAS HOMELESS” emblazoned across the back of it. I showed up like a street minister on parade, and Agent H looked like the picture next to the definition of homeless in the dictionary. I’ll just say:

    WE GOT NOTICED!
    Yeah. We were on display in that restaurant. Though neither Agent H nor I made mention of it, there was no denying it. We paraded Lubbock’s elephant-in-the-room right into that eating establishment – and did it right during the lunch hour! We were breaking a social taboo, and it was powerful! We did not encounter any resistance from anyone there at all, but after my experience at Walmart less than an hour before, I sensed (and I figure Agent H did too) that my wallet was his ticket to lunch. I mean, Agent H really looked the part! I can easily imagine he might not be welcome in a lot of places even if he had his own money.

    I directed Agent H to step up to the counter and order what ever he wanted from the menu, I would pay. He very humbly mumbled inaudibly. I asked him to repeat it. He mumbled some more. Then the lady behind the counter asked him to step closer so she could hear him. Then she began making suggestions that he nodded to, because I don’t think she ever heard him at all.

    I on the other hand finally made out the words “Dr. Pepper”! Good Agent H! I hear you!!!

    I just have to use my imagination. I don’t know really. Possibly the man is just a con and owns a mansion at the edge of town! If so, I am his chump. And really, WHO CARES??? But I lean more the other way. I bet he really likes Dr. Pepper, and it might have been a while since he was able to get one.

    We took a seat. I took off my hat. Agent H took off his hat. He spoke a little, but I really could only make out isolated words here an there. I just could not hear him even across the table. But I studied his features. His unkempt hair and weathered skin. His clothes. His walking stick and bag.

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    Then they called our number. I went to retrieve the food.

    When I returned, Agent H asked if we could pray and thank God for the meal! I agreed and bowed my head. Agent H blessed the lunch. Then we began eating. I listened to him mumble and could barely make out a word here and there.

    After a few minutes, I saw a drip form on the tip of his nose. I thought he might be sick, and I feared his nose drippings might manage to get into his food – AND THEN I WORRIED IF IT MIGHT GET ACROSS THE TABLE INTO MINE! I kept watching it closely to beware of it. And then I saw more clearly, the man mumbling softly – so softly that I could not understand him – was weeping. And then suddenly a clear coherent sentence presented itself to my ears and to my eyes.

    He said: THE JOY OF THE LORD IS MY STRENGTH!!!
    Suddenly I recognized that I was in the presence of a real prophet! Jesus was eating lunch with me. I could have taken my shoes off in that restaurant! I was on Holy Ground! This man was praising God and thanking him for his blessing all through lunch!

    We spent more than half an hour there. I really did not want lunch to end. His speech cleared up little by little as we ate. He preached at least two sermons for me that I could make out – and one of them was particularly good.

    “We are spiritual,” he said. “Adam and Eve in the garden were created spiritual and if they had chosen to live as spiritual creation, this world would be a different kind of place!”

    Amen! Agent H! Preach it, brutha!!!

    I was getting more and more into his sermon(s), trying hard to listen. I leaned in close. I concentrated, and for a few minutes, I don’t think we were really in Popeye’s restaurant. I think we entered a whole other dimension of reality. We slipped through the veil for a minute, and I only got back to Popeye’s when a fellow patron and his friend got up to leave. The friend was dumping the trash when his partner approached us and laid a $10 bill on the table in front of Agent H and said, “I think you need this more than I do.”

    Thank you! sir – who ever you are!!! I praise God for your kind generosity! If you find this blog and this post, I hope you will say hi to us – anonymously of course! You really blessed us, and everyone in that restaurant who witnessed it! Agent H thanks you. So does Jesus.

    I could go on and tell a hundred other observations and so forth, but this post would get too long. So I will jump to the end of it.

    When Agent H decided he was ready to leave, and after much weeping and preaching and praising, I noticed his speech was greatly improved, his posture improved, and he walked a lot stronger too. I should note that he never complained. He never lamented. He did confess sin at one point, but he mostly praised God and cried a lot while he ate. And so as we said our goodbyes on the parking lot, I hugged him, and I noticed that he did not stink at all! And I asked him to remember me when we get to the Judgment because Jesus will ask him about me. And he assured me that we would meet again there!

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    Just before he disappeared, I snapped a photo of him on the curb from a distance.

    I think if you look carefully and concentrate, you see Jesus in this picture.

    Agent H aka Jesus/the least of these…
    Agent H aka Jesus/the least of these…

    Funny. It almost seemed like I was there feeding a bum in that restaurant. Almost. For just a moment… almost. But really, he fed me.

    Thank You, Jesus!

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