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The F word and why I use it daily

“Let go all the trivial things that churn and bubble on the surface of your mind.”—A Course in Miracles

I’ve come up with a test for determining what’s important. If it’s widely misunderstood, it’s probably worth my attention.

Case in point: the word “God”—more baggage than a Samsonite store, completely misconceived, the coolest force on the planet. That’s why I rarely call it God.

Love is another word weighted down with misperceptions. We actually believe it’s something we have to find. In reality, it’s who we are, why we’re here, the only thing worthy of our time.

Today, I’d like to bring up another word with massive baggage problems. The F word. Forgiveness.

Most of us think it’s an act we’re forced to perform when horrific jerks do us wrong.

Forgiveness, as I see it, is realizing that no one HAS the power to do me wrong. To believe someone or something outside myself can hurt me is what started all the problems in the first place. It negates the Truth of who I am.

Being pissed off unplugs me from the F.P, this wild and crazy force that’s constantly trying to bless me. It erects a big wall between me and my highest good.

Believing outside forces can hurt me stunts my growth. Blinds me to all the miracles. Creates an illusory world that makes me want to hide, feel guilty, close down.

Each of us is here to strengthen the life force–in ourselves and in each other. If we point fingers and believe something outside ourselves can hurt us, we put the squeeze on this unbelievably cool and ever-present life force.

If anyone had the right to hold a grudge, it was Nelson Mandela. He was imprisoned for 27 years, three of his children died before he did, his second wife Winnie took a lover and his government treated him no better than a dog.

But instead of letting those injustices take away his dignity, his superpower of love, he used them to solidify a vision for a better world. He refused to BE imprisoned.

Which is what forgiveness is. And why I use the F word every day.

Pam Grout is the author of 17 books including E-Squared: 9 Do-it-Yourself Energy Experiments that Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality and the just-released sequel, E-Cubed, 9 More Experiments that Prove Mirth, Magic and Merriment is your Full-time Gig.

33 Responses

  1. “Forgiveness, as I see it, is realizing that no one HAS the power to do me wrong. To believe someone or something outside myself can hurt me is what started all the problems in the first place. It negates the Truth of who I am.”

    Pam, this struck home in me. I’ve spent the better (actually, worst) part of my life being angry, mad, or pissed off about one thing or another – always letting something or someone outside myself control my feelings and actions by giving in to the reaction I felt toward them or their words or actions. I’m actively changing that now, day by day.

    Thank you for your kind, inspiring words, and for both E-Squared and E-Cubed. I just gave away the 1st book, so I got another copy for myself, and picked up the 2nd book while I was at it!

    1. Way to go, we don’t need to give anybody the power to disturb us and ruin our energy field. Have a wonderful day 🙂

    2. Message came in at the perfect time, as I sit at an airport cafe after missing my flight by a minute, and I knocked at the gate door, and then I could see the plane and the pilots, as six of my fellow passengers waved our arms and tickets furiously at the pilots, knocking on the glass window trying to get the attention of the ground crew, passengers at the gate cheering us on — hoping we’d somehow pull off a Hail Mary, but alas our five minute quest to get on the flight was dashed … we showed spunk and determination. If we had got on that plane about 10-15 passagers cheering us on would have been part of our victory too, they were as charged up, and as let down as we were. So now, I’m enjoying a Pellegrino, fresh fruit, and connecting through the ethers. I think I’ll scope out an airport massage, read the last few pages of The Alchemist, and begin reading Power versus Force. Gotta adjust and allow …

      1. That’s super powerful when you can adjust. As a frequent traveler, being able to do this has kept traveling fun for me. Who’s to say there’s not a party to be had at the airport? Thanks for sharing!!

    3. Thanks, Lloyd! I’m so grateful that past anger can be dissolved right here, right now with the F word. We get to decide–that’s the beauty of it!!

      1. Not right now – would love to share what has occurred for me since teaching the classes – I ended up n the hospital n Feb and because of the book and classes, this adventure has changed my life – it’s involved and amazing! So are you – I just read your Living Life Out Loud for umpteenth time! It keeps me moving forward – thank you!

  2. Having read a large number of books about energy, recently came across Pam’s book and just loved it, specially because it’s so down to earth and direct and the experiments WORK !!!! Thanks so much for your wonderful and inspiring insight. I plan on attending one of your seminars in the near future.
    From Lima, Peru the best to you,
    Miriam 🙂

  3. Pam is on a roll. Just wanted to make sure you saw this one, your majesty. It’s soooo good.

    Love you,


  4. Pam, Another Awesome Post. Thank you.

    Please forgive me is part of the Ho’oponopono. Did you notice this note about DR. EMOTO DIES – THE PASSING OF A LEGEND
    OCTOBER 17, 2014

    His last word was “Arigato”. (“Thank you” in Japanese) The IMH staff said this last word was to you, everybody. He was so grateful for you and thanked you all so very much.

    1. Thanks for the head’s up. I didn’t realize that about Dr. Emoto. And also I happen to adore Ho’oponopono, even if it does take a full minute to type.

      1. And I connected with Dr. Emoto today. He reminded me that when we forgive ourselves, we are raising the frequency of the water in our body and as the water in each cell our body is part of all the water on earth, the act of forgiveness of self raises the frequency of all the water on earth. I love the syncronicity.

  5. I read Pam ALL day. Then when I really get in the peaceful mode, i always see a sign that I’m on the right track. Just saw a car with license plate PAM yesterday. Would’ve taken a pic but was driving. Thank you for everything Pam!

  6. Love this Pam!

    I forgive others (and, even more so, myself) for reasons I can sum up in one sentence:

    Holding on to angry resentment is like me drinking poison, hoping you die.

  7. Yesterday, I pulled out of our neighborhood after waiting for a slow line of approaching cars. The guy in front put on his turn-signal at the last second. I could have already pulled-out front and gone.

    Anyway, I got in the back of the line and we came to a slow traffic light two miles later. It finally went green, but turned back to red just as the car in front of me finally went through.

    So I sat there waiting, again, but it dawned on me that this was an opportunity to choose patience and just relax. So I did.

    According to A Course In Miracles, we all actually have a mission to realize the correlation between our creative minds and what we experience.

    I like this quote from the Urtext, Chapter 11:

    “When you have accepted your mission to PROJECT peace, you will FIND it.”

    I don’t know what Nelson was thinking. LOL.

  8. How do I know that I’ve really forgiven someone who has hurt me? Do I have to say it to their face to count to the FP? I’ve written forgiveness letters in my journal, does that count?

  9. Hello You AMAZING WONDERFUL WOMAN!!! That as per usual was EXACTLY what I needed to hear! …AGAIN WOW?!?!?! <3 Just been through Hell, and took the "Grand Tour" Ha Ha I never do things by halves!?! ;)) … came back better than I thought I would much faster than previous heartache and allot of that thanks to your books keeping me on track! Its been a few mths now and I was sailing along… had a deep dip yesterday, but picked myself up, read, did some tapping and then today your blog was perfect!!!
    YES!!!! feeling FREE!!!!
    Thank you Thank you Thank YOU!!!! xox

  10. Thank you, Pam for taking the Course and making it so accessible. I love the Course and facilitate a group weekly, and write about it most days, but you have a way of making it easy for people. I love your work. I love your blog. I linked to it from mine and have been recommending you to anyone who will listen. Keep up the good work. You are my inspiration.

  11. Can anyone please elaborate on this sentence Pam used:

    Being pissed off unplugs me from the F.P, this wild and crazy force that’s constantly trying to bless me.

    I find that very comforting. I understand that I am part of the FP and it is Me, and that it is infininte intelligence, abundance, love, etc. But to think of it as constnatly tyring to bless me is very exciting.

    Can anyone please expand upon this? Thank you.

    1. Any time we are pissed off, it is basically fighting what is. It is trying to make F.P. (God, the Universe) wrong. The ego gets pissed and refuses to appreciate that F.P. is constantly blessing us. But when we’re angry, we can’t see the blessings so we have essentially unplugged ourselves from recognizing our own good. F.P. always says ,”yes.” so you want to be noticing how right things are not thinking there is something wrong.

      1. Thank you Nancy.

        I’m still just trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I am being constantly blessed! For some reason, that is almost too wonderful to believe. I know it is true because I have seen glimpses of it, but I am trying to teach myself to see and feel the blessings all the time! Pam’s book is helping a lot. Thank you again.

  12. Can anyone please elaborate on the sentence:

    Being pissed off unplugs me from the F.P, this wild and crazy force that’s constantly trying to bless me.

    I understand that I am part of the FP and It is part of me, and that it is infinite intelligence, abundance, love, etc. But I have never thought of it in terms of that it is trying to bless me! Is that why I feel so good when I think about things I want?

    This is a very new and exciting concept to me. Can anyone please elaborate on this? Thank you.

  13. Dear Pam,

    I recently started the experiments in E-Squared (E-Cubed is next!) and decided I could have a lovely, yummy marriage. This after several years, well, NOT having one. I felt like I had so much to forgive, but finally I let it all go and focused on us already building a beautiful marriage. I shared about it here: http://evarawposa.com/pretend-best-marriage

    I’m REALLY starting to get this stuff! But seeing this post RIGHT NOW is another amazing piece I was missing (well, couldn’t see!).

    Thank you for all you do. I’m chuffed to the bits at what this is doing in my life. And now I’m even realizing that all of the successes I’ve had have been experiments like yours, where I went all in and didn’t attach myself to the outcome. AMAZING.

    Seriously (but with a big smile!!): THANK YOU SO MUCH!!


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