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Mirror, mirror in the sky  

“Habits create a caricature of yourself.”—Marc Maron

You’ve probably heard of mirror work—where you gaze at your reflection in the bathroom mirror and tell yourself how strong and beautiful and capable you are.

Here’s why I never do that.

That woman who looks at me from the mirror is not the real me.

Focusing on that tiny sliver of a face and a body is like worshipping a single one of my 50 trillion cells. Without the other cells, that one solitary cell is useless.

Finding meaning or identity in my physical body blocks a deeper life force that wants to move through me. It blocks real meaning, real beauty, real substance.

Most of us squander our average 75 years on planet earth believing we are the image in the mirror. We slavishly work to protect it, to keep it going at all costs, to make it look as society tells us it should look.  

As the Course so plainly tells me, I am under no laws but God’s. All the strange and twisted human laws of beauty, economics, medicine and nutrition are only enforced when I cling so desperately to that caricature in the mirror.

Imagine how different our lives would be if we didn’t feel the compulsion to perpetually ensure its safety?

When we believe the image is who we are, we’re stuck and scared and unable to see the bigger glories.  

We are the life force itself, stars masquerading as separated reflections in a mirror.

Instead of talking to a mirror, I like to notice myself in the night sky, in the Milky Way, in the love that flows in and throughout the entire cosmos. #222 Forever!

Pam Grout is the author of 20 books including E-Squared, E-Cubed, Thank & Grow Rich and her latest book, The Course in Miracles Experiment: A Starter Kit for Rewiring Your Mind (And Therefore Your World).

53 Responses

  1. Thank you , Pam.
    You answered the question I asked of Creation recently… Can it really be? The sparkling stars up there and all the rest of it? We are this, too?
    Oh my gosh!!

  2. I see the mirror as I see I great many of the world’s tools, especially the “spiritual world’s” things like crystal’s, special practices ect. as the magic the Course talks about. Sometimes we need something for now, but to think we have to do or have anything but Love is complete foolishness. I call it my quiet knowing. A almost constant thought that creation is perfect. When I forget this, I forgive myself and reset. Peace and I Love your insight.

  3. You make good points, Pam. And you’ve made several here.

    I’ve read/studied (and continue to do so) several editions of the Course, and in defense of mirror work: the Course teaches ultimately about finding peace via ending conflict. May I then suggest that the “self-hatred” (the self you made) IS the primary source of conflict in an individual’s life – and then spills out into one’s world interpretation – as conflict.

    Isn’t Mirror Work’s aim is to overcome this at the level of in its inception? – an idea, I believe, the Course also promotes.

  4. So glad I am able to keep up with your messages as I work through the course. This was a good reinforcement for me today. Thank you.

  5. (this post hopefully without the typos that “damned self I made” did in the first try. -LoL):

    You make good points, Pam. And you’ve made several here.

    I’ve read/studied (and continue to do so) several editions of the Course, and in defense of mirror work: the Course teaches ultimately about finding peace via ending conflict. May I then suggest that the “self-hatred” (the self you made) IS the primary source of conflict in an individual’s life – and then spills out into one’s world interpretation – AS conflict.

    Isn’t Mirror Work’s aim to overcome this at the level of its inception? – an idea, I believe, the Course also promotes.


      1. Actually I haven’t done it either – but should.

        Anyway, looking for something to get rid of (conflict) – except where it IS – seems likely a futile search. I believe the Course points that out.

        And I agree with you: that image in the mirror is NOT the real/entire you – and mustn’t be confused as such.

    1. Stunning Antti! Talk about seeing the stars in reflection of our world! Whew-love it.

  6. Hi Pam…..Thank you heart to heart for this beautiful insightful post……as I approach my 82nd birthday, I am enormously grateful that my spiritual life and intuition have sustained me through some very complex challenges and changes………stargazing and the beauty of the trees and the sound of the ocean are invaluable….. and I love to hear my little cat purring when she is near me……sending regards from Virginia Beach where I met you at A.R.E…..keep up the good work ! Sending blessings to you and your family…..from Fay Kennedy

  7. Wow! I love the idea that we are stars masquerading as separate identities in a mirror. That’s great! And I also love the concept that we can find ourselves in the night sky, or in any of the beauty around us – like in the trees, in the happy flight of a butterfly, or maybe in the smile of a baby. And in the love that weaves between and within it all. Thankyou Pam- I had been looking forward to another post from you and this one is just right! 😁🦋✨🌳💛

  8. I love mirror work…as I look into my eyes (not the image) I feel I am looking inro my soul and corresponding with me

  9. Thank you Pam! I can’t always find mySelf in the mirror either but I love how Louise Hay would bring out her little mirror at a workshop or interview and model for us how to tell herSelf that she was Beautiful and Loved! For reasons unclear to me, I really ‘needed’ to hear from you -thank you for showing up with your wonderful Self just now. I feel more reassured when I know you’re out there!

    1. Marney-I was thinking of Louise Hay and her ‘mirror work’ – she was so much fun and we were graced to have her with us for 90 years. I am now 86 and still sing “I love myself the way I am………” in the mornings when I put a little paint and polish on my face – just because I want to! Of course the stars, the trees and the birds reflect who I am – the sky today is a perfect blue here in SC. We are all One and I love you just the way you are.

  10. Pam – I’ve been searching most of my 81 years, only to find that now, the mirror is not the place to “see” yourself. Yes, I can find myself in the skies, day or night, in nature, and just watching a blade of grass. Thank you!

  11. I love this! As an astrologer I totally agree with you. The more astrological profiles I’ve done, the more I realize how limited we are by identifying with the person in the mirror.

  12. Thank you Pam
    A daily doze of joyful optimism is greatly appreciated
    I will store your email in my brain, to be retrieved when needed,

    1. I believe so too, Linda, Here are a couple of passages from the Course (HLC edition) I think pertain:

      Ch. 30e: “His one mistake is that he thinks them real.”

      Ch. 30h: “Remember, then, that whenever you look without and react unfavorably to what you see, you have judged yourself unworthy and have condemned yourself to death.”

      It also says there IS no distinction between within and without. That’s in Chapter 10.

      Disapproving of your own perceived image seems like attempting to find the complete joy God created you for – while simultaneously rejecting some aspect of yourself, or brother, or the world – which the Course says are the same.

      I don’t understand how anyone can expect to have a satisfying life experience, while also judging against themselves in some way. Didn’t Jesus say (in the Bible) the kingdom of Heaven wasn’t in some afterlife experience, but here, now?

      My conclusion is learn to love the person you see in the mirror too, but don’t mistake it for what you really are.

  13. Hi Pam,
    Always love your inspirations. Thank you for sharing and your mirror insight got me thinking and so I wanted to share this song by my daughter that is another take on the mirror being each other. Hope you enjoy it and we can keep on expanding and inspiring each other to live our lives to their utmost fullest within the stars moon and sky!!
    Be well,

      1. Thank you for even commenting! They are all Grinnellians and I am sending you love.

  14. Pam, all I can say is thank you for all your insights. You never disappoint. You make me look at the world and my self with new eyes!

  15. Hi Pam:
    Per usual your Nate is one way of seeing things and is the big and broad view.
    I’m going to offer another point of view here. The Course teaches us that nothing is real and that we are all connected. So that picture in the mirror is not real and that mirror isn’t real either. On the other hand that mirror and I are one. I’m seeing what my mind tells me is a reflection of this body. If I am critical of the image then I can ignore it but if I’m saying I love you even if to a reflection and I like what I see then I’m happy and sending out good vibes every where, even to to cosmos because everything is part of everything else.
    So I wish you happiness and good vibes!

  16. I resonate deeply with Janelle Jaquith on this one sister. I respectfully honor each consciousness as it blossoms, however am profoundly aware that the human avatar is a phenomenal and wondrous mastery of creation and indeed a remarkable gift to self! It is the adventuring explorative expressive and expanding medium through which we are able to exchange our unique essence of Lovelight! Yes, we may traverse between the shadowlands, the budding springtime meadows, the sparkling blankets of our inner winters and the dreamers limitless illuminated constellations of our eternal potential…Yes all these aspects once enveloped empower us to revel in the magic that we are! So when I peer into the physical mirror I see the eternal limitless multidimensional quantum creator inviting me to dance, sing, laugh and love out loud as the reflection of all that is manifests a temporary oasis for every elemental electron, proton and neutron and atomic spiral to experience itself anew! Whooo-hooooo! it is not about the image at all, but the imagination that emanates from lives within it that I cherish the most. #TogetherWeRise

  17. Beautifully said. Thank you, Carlotta Jay. It’s so fulfilling when someone sees what I have written, understands and writes in such an exquisite way, expanding what I am trying to convey. I am grateful to you, Carlotta. Your writing is lovely and your understanding is boundless!

  18. WOW…Pam I just read this and all I can say is wow…I’ve never thought about it in this way but u r so right, and it struck such a deep cord with me that I just feel something in my heart so real about it! Thank you so much, u r awesome!!! Have an amazingly awesome day and week!!! ❤️🥰

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