“It’s the stories we tell ourselves that cause all the problems. If you look reality straight in the eye, you end up a lot less confused.”—Nell Zink
So I gave myself an incredible gift over the holidays. It did not feel like a gift at the time. But it so powerfully reinforced everything I believe that I’m hoping I shan’t (wow! Where did that word come from?) dig it up again.
For whatever reason, I decided to pull out one of my old, treasured stories. It’s an Oscar-worthy tale with lots of drama, plenty of pathos and my body knows exactly what to do with it, starting with manufacturing and dumping an assortment of stress chemicals.
I put everything I had into this oh-so familiar pity party. And sure enough, it demonstrated, once again, the power of thoughts and beliefs. Life itself is stunningly beautiful—except when we put ourselves in the prisons of certain stories and beliefs. Our stories do indeed create worlds.
So here is my thankfully short-lived holiday tale. Instead of celebrating and reveling in all the wonderful holiday memories I have with my beautiful daughter, I decided to pout about the unfairness of the fact she’s no longer here. I put all my energy into the story that this was my fifth Christmas without my favorite person in the whole wide world. You can imagine the result.
I was grumpy to my partner. I was withdrawn at his family’s Christmas Eve feast. In other words, I suffered because I fed a thought that doesn’t look reality straight in the eye. I know good and well Taz isn’t really “gone.” Heck, I still talk to her every day. I feel her presence around me. I consider myself incredibly lucky to have spent 25 years of my life with her Divine being, right here in the material world.
The old story is compelling. As sad stories go, it gets five stars. Unless you live in Ukraine or say, Somalia, it’s hard to find a tale that garners more sympathy. But why choose to forfeit right here, right now with a belief that causes suffering.
I know people will say, “but you have the right to your emotions!” and, yes, I believe I do. But I also believe I deserve happiness and that I can curate which stories I choose to water and grow in my consciousness.
I’m grateful for this experience that offered more proof that we do indeed create our reality. And I remain committed to life that’s happening right now in this beautiful, never-to-be repeated moment. #222 Forever!
Pam Grout is the author of 20 books including E-Squared, E-Cubed, Thank & Grow Rich and her latest, The Course in Miracles Experiment: A Starter Kit for Rewiring Your Mind (And Therefore Your World).