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Hello! Do you really want to hang on so tightly to that idea?

“It’s not what you don’t know that kills you, it’s what you know for sure that just ain’t true.”
–Mark Twain

If you’re a parent, your kids have undoubtedly accused you of T.M.I. It stands for “too much information.” That’s what I want to address today.

Over our lifetime, we receive T.M.I., most of which is T.M.F.I. (“too much false information.”) I’m talking about such accepted concepts as:

“Life is hard.”
“It takes a long time to accomplish anything of value.”
“Relationships are continuously challenging.”

These accepted bits of information are what British evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins calls “memes.” In short, it’s a concept that explains how ideas, behaviors and styles spread from person to person within a culture. Like genes, they self-replicate, mutate and are capable of playing havoc with our lives.

Most of us are unaware of how big a role memes play in the way we experience life. They’re like the kitchen junk drawer that’s filled with a bunch of forgotten items: a dried up magic marker, rusty scissors, old birthday cards from people you don’t even remember and keys that probably used to open something although you’re not sure what.

For those of us interested in manifesting and creating our own reality, it’s important to clean out the junk drawer, to examine the memes that run our belief systems.

Here are a couple popular memes I have decided to abandon:

1. “It’s necessary to get 8 hours of sleep.”

Who came up with that figure? It certainly wasn’t Thomas Edison who liked to boast that he slept but three or four hours a night and that he sometimes worked for 72 hours straight. The Course in Miracles makes it very clear that the only thing that makes us tired is our thoughts. And, of course, our commitment to the meme that you MUST get eight hours of sleep.

That particular meme has been a boon for the pharmaceutical industry that has made a killing out of Ambien and other sleep drugs.

I prefer this meme: “I always get the right amount of sleep.”

2. “If you’re overweight, you should diet.”

Ahhhhh, right? Whoever generated that particular meme should be marched to the guillotine. Dieting only resets your metabolism lower. It should be obvious to all of us that diets DO NOT WORK!! Except for the diet industry that has made billions off that big, fat lie.

I prefer this meme: “I can eat whatever I want and maintain a perfect weight.”

3. “It’s imperative to put your nose to the grindstone if you want to make any money.”

Also known as “nothing good comes without hard work,” this little myth perpetuates a lot of pain and suffering. The truth is everything originates with our thoughts. EVERYTHING. In fact, when you do what you love, working is more like playing. It’s big fun, the thing you’d do even if you weren’t being paid.

Hard work plays no part of it and besides, what exactly is a grindstone?

My meme of choice regarding finances is this: “The more fun I have in my work, the more money I make.”

What are some of the memes that run your life?

Pam Grout is the author of 18 books including E-Squared: 9 Do-it-Yourself Energy Experiments that Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality and the about to be released, Thank and Grow Rich: a 30-day Experiment in Shameless Gratitude and Unabashed Joy

36 Responses

  1. Hi Pam, I appreciate all you do. Because you took the time to reply to a previous email I have proceeded to write my book. Thank you for your inspiration!

  2. Love this! This is so true. I need to reset a lot of the “memes” in my head. Thanks for the inspiration, Pam!

    1. YOu’re so welcome, Kristin. And may I suggest an eensie little tweak. You don’t NEED to do anything, but you might choose to. Kinda takes off the energetic charge.

  3. Hi Pam,

    Good morning!

    Had to write, so excited about bringing you out for our department meeting..more to come once we set a date, I SO WOULD love to have you there!

    The reason for writing,

    Am doing those breathing exercise, love that book by the way, thank you!, and I wanted to share a new mantra,

    current: Beach body here I come, Beach body here I come once, ect.
    other: Better body here I come, Better body here I come once..

    It was helping me get away from wanting that ‘barbie’ body and more about a happier body..

    The other one was I read the post this morning and I had a question, you are saying ‘I can eat whatever I want and have the body I want’, which is great!; however, how does eating what is good for our bodies..eating candy and drinking pop will destroy our bodies where as eating spinach and drinking water makes our bodies strong. If you were to feed a dog, super healthy animal, sugar and pop all day, they would die. Are you saying that a healthy thought will counter poisonous food..

    Thank you for being amazing, a trail blazer, and a revolutionary. You have completely changed my life! I have butterflies all over my house reminding me of you, your teachings, and the universe.

    Thank you!


    From: Pam Grout <comment-reply@wordpress.com>
    Reply-To: Pam Grout <comment+ljivns4sjbhxq1fm-3dsm3p@comment.wordpress.com>
    Date: Thursday, April 21, 2016 at 7:18 AM
    To: Sarah Carey <sarah@rmcdmc.com>
    Subject: [New post] Hello! Do you really want to hang on so tightly to that idea?

    psgrout posted: ““It’s not what you don’t know that kills you, it’s what you know for sure that just ain’t true.” –Mark Twain If you’re a parent, your kids have undoubtedly accused you of T.M.I. It stands for “too much information.” That’s what I want to address today. “

    1. There have been many cases of people who ate “too much sugar” who had no ill effects. If you don’t have the strong cultural paradigm that tells us it’s so dangerous, a whole different outcome often occurs. But because the cultural story is SO pervasive, so consistently in our face, we all have to make those kinds of decisions for ourselves. I mostly choose to listen to what my body says it wants.

  4. Just think of effects of all the nonsense we accept without questioning! Thanks for reminding us, Pam! Keep up the great work — I mean, play!

  5. How about the average age for humans is three score and ten. Or how about the brain deteriorates at a certain age “you’re too old to learn”. My meme? Use it or lose it.

  6. Here’s one: “Getting old means your body is supposed to fall apart and your brain stop working.” People tell me, “Don’t get old, Bob.” Why not? Is there something WRONG with more experience on this magical earth? Now, if my body IS falling apart, that’s another question altogether.

    1. Love this, Bob! It’s crazy how brainwashed we are about the body. It’s simply a representation of our thoughts. Lots of forces out there want us to think it’s out to get us.

  7. Right on with this one Pam! Here are three more insidious beliefs that are equal or even worse: 1. I must do well or very well! 2. I must be loved and approved by everyone important to me. 3. I am a bad and worthless person if I get rejected.
    There are many more. Aren’t our learning histories fun??

    1. What great insight, Ed! And what a great way to describe it–fun learning histories. We should all be laughing instead of taking it all so seriously.

  8. I hear ya, about the memes. My most recent education, somewhat of a meme, has to do with my kid’s education. I had this idea that for him to get the best education possible, he had to go to either public or private school, and be taught by a person with a master’s degree in education. Well, that might be true for some kids, but not for mine. He has anxiety that has recently become quite severe (we’re working with a doctor and doing energy work on him) and I had to take him out of school. For HIM, the best course will look very different from what I experienced going to public school. And I know that he will be better for it in the long run. What an adjustment my poor brain had to go through over the past few months, though! Had to process and dump a lot of my fears, judgments and assumptions. Now I’m getting excited about tailoring his education to his special needs (dyslexia, anxiety, ADHD), waiting to one day see him fly!

  9. I love this. Was thinking about the sleep thing and how deeply ingrained it is. I would love it Pam if you made a book of all your blog posts :)))

  10. The Course in Miracles makes it very clear that the only thing that makes us tired is our thoughts. That one sentence says it all. My mantra has been “I’m tired” for years! My body responded. What you said about dieting was something I set out to prove but might have had better results if I believed it fully. :(. Now I need to take my 10 a.m. nap. 🙁

  11. Dear Pam

    I love you and your work.

    Re the sleep, I just need to say as I am a health practitioner and love to support people in being well.

    Good sleep is important – it’s the time the brain and system gets cleansed. Many people are so stressed they don’t get enough. There is lots of research showing people who sleep poorly or not very much are far more prone to dementia.

    Margaret Thatcher slept very little and got dementia

    love and huge thanks and blessings Michaela

    *Michaela O’Driscoll Integrative medicine, Homeopathy and Sound healing http://www.CrystalSoundMedicine.net +44 7446 018612 Another world is possible, she is on her way, On quiet days I can hear her breathing.*

    1. I love that quote on the bottom of your email. Isn’t that Arundhati Roy? Yes, sleep is important. But freaking out if you don’t get what somebody else tells you you need is more disturbing to the body than lack of sleep. I always prefer to write my own rules. Or rather let my body decide. Thanks for this great reminder.

  12. Pam – I am a huge fan and have been following you for a while – and this is my first time commenting but I had a revelation just now that I need to share! I am a believer in instant healing (if I feel I am coming down with something, I just “E-square It” and it’s gone overnight) but I came down with the flu and over a week ago and I haven’t been able to shake it. I had to cancel several commitments and I’ve been sitting on my couch watching silly movies and it hit me: I didn’t WANT to do some of those commitments anyway, and being sick actually served me because I had an excuse to cancel. So what about getting rid of this old belief : “One needs a really good excuse to say no or cancel” – what if we just always honored what we truly want and/or need? I didn’t need to get sick in order to cancel something on my calendar that I was resenting anyway! Thanks for the insight… oh, and I’m feeling better already!

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